Wilding Fifty: Surf Tales
Wilding Fifty: Surf Tales
My Gnarly Surf Pal with Emily Buswell
This week’s podcast is a special one to my heart because I interview my surf pal, the one who has consistently met me about once a week to surf together for the past year. We talk about the importance of a surf pal for commitment, enthusiasm, surfing year round, being the witness to one another’s growth, exploring new locations together, boogie boarding, running, motherhood, and finding liberation in your 50s to get your tomboy on. Emily is lighthearted, honest and you will wish she was your surf pal too!
Episode Highlights:
[00:00] Why you need a surf pal
[03:11] How to surf year round
[05:00] Surfing different breaks
[08:07] Being the Witness
[09:27] Remembering your boogie
[12:30] Running for mind over matter
[17:29] Getting your tomboy on
Quotes from Emily:
" It was such a flash that came flooding back of a memory. I had an orange boogie board, and I'd go out there with my little bathing suit, maybe it matched. I would just go out with the kelp and it was freezing cold. I did not care. The ocean would just hold me.
"Don't forget you're that Emily still who loves to have fun, you're still easygoing and light and it's okay to be silly even though you're a mom now. It’s okay to let go a little bit."
"I love that I'm doing this because it feels so good to my body. My body is responding. I'm old enough to know what that feels like now. I don't know if I would have known that, 10 years ago, but I've come this far and I'm so grateful. I wouldn't have it any other way."
Get in touch with Emily
- Instagram @emiliamaria13
More about Christine Foerster
- christinefoerster.com
- Instagram @christinefoerster
Christine: Testing, testing. Okay. I can see it now.
Emily: Okay. Testing. Testing. Good.
Christine: Hi Emily.
Emily: Hi, Christine
Christine:. Okay. We just recorded this entire interview, and it never recorded, so here we are again. Take two.
Emily: Take two.
Christine: Gosh. I hope we get all of our good stuff in here. Okay. I wanted to start talking about the importance of having a PAL in any new adventure, anything you wanna learn. So you're my best surf pal. You want the pal for accountability, for fun, for enthusiasm. And so we met through a mutual friend named Ariel. Shout out to Ariel! She saw you surfing down there at the beach with your boys all the time. And I was always asking her, I was practically begging her to go surfing with me. And she's like, okay, I'm gonna set these two women up. And it's been this amazing connection, right? We clicked from the moment we met each other.
Emily: Yes.
Christine: Our entire relationship has basically happened out in the ocean.
Emily: Yes. I know we are clothed, right now, like we're usually in wetsuits the entire time I think we've met with each other, except for one time, like did come to your house for a hangout, but other than that, we've, our friendship has just been in the water.
Christine: I don't think I've ever had a friend that was so, like, just around one thing, but we've gotten really close. Right? It's a nice time to talk and get to know one another, especially if you hit it off. I feel like you're my long lost friend from years ago and it was a good match. So again, thanks Ariel.
Emily: Yes, thank you.
Christine: And I hope Ariel will come out with us sometime.
Emily: I would love that.
Christine: So we've been trying to go together once a week since the summer of 2021. And my goal last year was to surf through winter because I've been trying to surf for a couple years now, but to be honest, I was kind of like a touristy surfer, where I would go when the conditions were good. It was kind of like a summertime thing, and then as soon as the water got cold, I'd say, okay, I'm done, and I'd be out. But last year my goal was, if I'm really committed to this, I have to surf through the whole year, cuz that's what a surfer does. And so it was so helpful to have you there for accountability.
Emily: Yeah, that was, I felt the same with you because I thought, I wanna do this too. I would like to continue during the winter. I have a buddy, my best surf buddy. I’m going, and we're gonna do this.
Christine: Yeah. And did. There were a couple times when I remember it was cold and a little rainy, and I'm like texting you, I’m not gonna go. And you're like, well, I'm going! Okay, well I'm going too.
Emily: I remember I told my husband, he is like, good, you both should go. We are!
Christine: And it turns out that it's not so bad, right? Because as cold as it gets is 59, 58 degrees, right? And people are surfing in Alaska in the Great Lakes. What are we complaining about? It's not that bad. And you were the one that really convinced me to get a warm wetsuit cuz you had a really nice Patagonia wetsuit. I shouldn't be saying that unless Patagonia, you wanna sponsor us or something? But you gotta have the right gear. And make yourself comfortable.
Emily: Yeah. Once I got that Patagonia wetsuit, I was completely at ease in the water. My body wasn't shivering and I felt calmer and I can move around a little bit easier, and I'm like, oh, okay, this is how it's supposed to be. This is how I’m not freezing my butt off
Christine: Because it's a challenge. It's a very steep learning curve. It's a challenging sport. So why are you gonna make yourself miserable while you're doing that, there's already a lot going on. We started going to the harbor together because we both like the community there, and we did a lot of white water riding in the early days. And then we moved onto the pier because we realized that the white wash had a little bit more of a power source to it. And at a certain point, we started getting a little bit closer to the lineup. But I started feeling like I needed more technical skills to really be there in the lineup. And so we started going to Terramar where it's a little bit more of a beginner break. So how has that transition been for you?
Emily: It's been really informative for me. I'm gathering so much information just from being at the harbor. And then from there, the pier and I was like, okay, this is totally different. It felt different to me at least. And we were paddling out a little bit farther, so it was great to get to learn at the harbor cause I can look back now and go, oh, that was a lot more challenging than I realized. Had I started to learn at Terramar, which would've been great too, but I didn't, then going to Terramar, I'm like, oh, this feels so much like lighter, there was a little bit more of a gentler wave. But having that experience at the harbor from the beginning when I was sort of first learning again was really beneficial. And I didn't know it at the time.
Christine: I think that it's taught us to be stronger paddlers and to really understand how to get through the whitewater, right? Cuz you've gotta do that to travel out. I think if you start at Terramar, you probably don't get as much experience. You get better at riding the open face waves for sure. Because it's such a simple paddle out. That's a thing that strikes you. There's really no struggle. Like all you have to do is struggle to get through that big old heap of seaweed, not get tangled there. But then you get out to the lineup pretty easily. I did, however, hear about two days ago that there was this really dangerous rip tide and a woman had gotten caught out in it, lost her board, and then this guy went out and tried to help her and he lost his board. And I don't know what actually ended up happening, but it, it really took me by surprise because it is such a gentle break every time I've been there. But it really shows you, again, how quickly the ocean can change.
Emily: I know you mentioned that to me and it's so humbling. You just kind of go, okay, like I'll forget sometimes because this is so much fun. But how quickly the ocean can change and how focused you need to be of what you're doing and who you're out there with and just what's going on. All the things.
Christine: And take a good look at the ocean before you ever paddle out. That's what I'm gonna do. At Terramar you can have that vantage point up from the stairs and you can see is there any like difference in the rippling of the water? Can you spot a riptide here? Are the people out on the lineup? Are they pretty much staying stationary or are they drifting? It's a good reminder to just take a look at what you're moving into. Another point of having a surf pal is that you can really appreciate one another's progress.Because we said, surfing is a very steep learning curve and a lot of times I think you feel like you're just not progressing. You're not getting better. There was one time about eight, no, six months ago. You just turned to me and you're like,
Christine, you're getting so much better! And I was like, you are too! And we had this big like hug in the water because we're always kind of dorks.
Emily: We don’t care.
Christine: We had this great moment of joy and it's nice to know that you actually are improving, and to have somebody witness that.
Emily: Yes. That's so great because you feel like empowered and your confidence is built even more, and you're like, Oh my gosh, this is working. What I am doing is working and this is so much fun and. Look at how far I've come. So awesome.
Christine: I was just thinking, I have this dear friend in Italy and I hope it's not like this…I don't see her very often. I see her every five or six years, and when I see her we always have this joke where we give each other a big hug and we're like, you haven't changed a bit, even though we know it's not true. Actually, she's an Italian. She doesn't look like she's changed at all.
Emily: I assure you, I am not lying to you. You have changed, and the fact that you're catching all these wave, it's really noticeable.
Christine: Yeah. you are too. And I've always been a big admirer of your graceful squat and your graceful movement as you catch the wave and ride. Let's go back. We did a lot of boogie boarding as kids and I'm pretty sure that this has helped us both tremendously. My family, we were not into surfing at all, but we did a lot of sports and there was this running joke in our family that we were the only kids that had to train for our family vacations. My dad was a big sailor and we would go to Baja and my brother and I had always had our boogie boards and we would just be praying that we would camp somewhere where there were waves. We spent a lot of time in the water. And you mentioned growing up north in Northern California that you did too. So you wanna talk a little bit about that?
Emily: Yeah. I grew up in Los Gatos, which is relatively close to Santa Cruz. That's where our beach that we'd go to. And we would go there often, and we'd bring our boogie boards and I loved it. It was something I just adored and I had an orange boogie board, and I'd go out there with my little bathing suit, maybe it matched. I would just go out with the kelp and it was freezing cold. I did not care and I loved it. The ocean would just hold me and I have such fond memories of that. I think now surfing, of course a million years ago, it feels like those memories of my childhood, that joy is still the same when I'm surfing. I can recall it and the sheer pleasure of surfing was just kind of the same how I felt when I was a kid,you know, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, whatever. It was fun. And my parents weren't surfers either, but they would just hang out on the beach and, watch and always supportive with whatever we wanted to do in regards to sports and stuff like that. A fun time, fun memory
Christine: It teaches you such basic skills, right? I have heard this now that surf instructors will say, go get a boogie board if you're learning to surf because you are upping the stakes by taking an actual surfboard on the water if you don't really know what you're doing. But if you have a boogie board, it's softer material. You can learn how to ride down the line a little bit. Angle your take and just that feeling of the movement in the water. It's such a nice tool. And a nice return too. I agree with you that there's so many memories as a child of boogie boarding, cuz I left the boogie probably when I was in junior high and then I got more into ocean swimming and did all these other sports. But I haven't really gotten on a boogie board but I'm on a surfboard, and it really is this nice connection to your childhood.
Emily: It is. I didn't realize it was gonna be like that until I got out. I was like, oh wow. It was such a flash that came flooding back of a memory. And I forgot. I loved this as a kid and it was really cool. I was thinking back, don't forget you're that Emily still who loved to have fun, you know, and you're, you're still easygoing and light and it's okay to be silly even though you're a mom now. It’s okay to let go a little bit. And be okay with that. Even the more vulnerable feelings when you're out in the ocean.
Christine: We also were on the track team in high school. I just learned that about you. I didn't even know you were a runner and I did a lot of running in my early adult years like you. I'm curious how running has informed learning to surf. Are there any parallels that you see there?
Emily: I would say probably mind over matter, maybe pushing through like a long run or a sprint. I was on the sprint team and so just mentally preparing myself like, I can do this. Maybe it was like super duper hot and maybe that was what my mental state was when I was in high school. Later on doing half marathons, pushing that last mile, but mentally telling myself I can do this even though if I'm feeling a little uneasy. Or if my body is like, really can you? So I think it just helped kind of get that muscle going, of switching gears of saying, no, you can do this. I know that sounds kind of cliche, but that was a constant in those moments. And so I feel like with surfing, and it did intimidate me a little bit but trying to mentally say, no, you can do this. Go try it, see what you can do.
Christine: You surprise yourself. And running is such a mental game. I remember as I progressed more as a runner that you make that shift cuz your body's always saying, oh, it hurts. Oh, it's uncomfortable. And you realize, actually no. I'm stronger and more capable than what my body's telling me. But it's that shift in your brain is what you're talking about too, as long as you're not injuring yourself, obviously. Or like pushing through pain in a bad way. That inner kind of strength and drive, I think then helps. With surfing there's a lot of paddling work to keep going and keep moving. It can become very strenuous. So you've talked a lot about how learning to surf has helped you to build confidence in air, other areas of your life, and I'd love for you to talk a little bit more about that and maybe give us an example or two.
Emily: Decision making has been something when I was younger I was like, oh, I don't know if I should do this. Kind of going back and forth. But when I got into surfing, I'm so in the moment I have to commit. No, you can take this wave, take it. Just do it. Don't think about it. You know, you can do it. And if you, if you fall, you fall. So applying that to motherhood like, I know what I'm doing. I can take care of these kids. It's intimidating at times. You're like, oh my gosh, I've never been a mom before. What the heck? Just applying that and confidence in being a mother. Maybe late at night when your kid's sick, you're like what? You’ve got croup cough? Oh my gosh, what do I do? Do I call the pediatrician? So just I get calm, get focused. I don't do this all the time, but it, surfing has helped me keep a little more calm. It's been such a life lesson and reminder for me to constantly do that. And that has brought more confidence to myself because I know I'm capable of doing it.
Christine: Tell What about that time you said that you were in the mountains with your family?
Emily: I was in Mammoth and my husband and our friend Taylor, they went mountain biking and her husband, Brett had injured himself. So he hung out with us and my boys and he says, why don't we go take the boys to go bouldering? Great, let's go. So we go over there and he goes, Emily, why don't you try this boulder? And I was like, okay. I'm like, what? Why did I just say, okay? I don't boulder. I'll try it. He's like, I think you can do it. It's about 10 feet tall, probably be as tall as your ceilings in here. So I go and I do it, and I'm nervous, I'm like shaking almost. I'm gonna try this. I wanna see if I can do it. And I think the only reason why I did it was because I've been going out surfing with you and by myself and facing some scary moments or intimidating moments rather. And I did it. I went to the top of the boulder and I got up like off and I was like, oh my gosh. I did this and I did it twice. And he got it on video and I mean, I didn't cry, but I was like cheering myself. I'm like, look at what I just did. The last time I had done something like that was about 12 years ago with my husband. I showed him the video. He is like, what? What happened 12 years ago you were crying to get off the rock climbing wall. Get me off of this thing. And I think it's from surfing. Yeah. I think it's the only reason why I was able to do this. Cause I've found this seed of confidence that I've been slowly nurturing. And Emily, it's still in there.
Christine: That's beautiful. It's wonderful to have that awareness. Yourself and your own growth. That's so cool. I am 50 and you are 47. And we are in that age in which a lot of Western culture is basically telling us to just give up already. And, we're obviously going through some significant hormonal changes. Any ideas about this?
Emily: Oh, my, I’m still searching, lots of acupuncture and herbs. I find that surfing for me, I think I'm probably repeating myself, but it's so empowering to me and my body is still strong. I am taking good care of it. And, you know, it's a daily practice of stretching and mindfulness and I wanna keep doing this even though like you said, Western Society is like, well you're 47, you're 50. But I'm like, great. Bring it on. I don't consider myself like I've aged out or whatever. I can do it. And I love that I'm doing this because it feels so good to my body. My body is responding, I love how my hair feels after I get outta the water, like all of it. It feels right and I'm old enough to know what that feels like now. I don't know if I would have known that, you know, 10 years ago, whatever, but I've come this far and I'm so grateful. I wouldn't have it any other way.
Christine: My experience with turning 50 is that it's been very liberating. I just feel like I'm not as worried about what other people think. I get more joy and feel value of myself and my strength. I'm not so dependent on maybe my perception of my physical appearance the way I was at 18 or 25 or even 30. I've kind of moved beyond that. Well, not always, but I'm trying to remember who, who said this. There was this woman I listened to one time that said that turning 50 or whatever, with these changes, you return a little bit to your 12 year old self before you went through puberty. And I love that feeling, that you just remember how you were at 12, when you were really carefree and you didn't care because you were not this reproductive body walking around. It was a little bit like you had your tomboy on. And I think that's it. You can explore your inner tomboy a little bit more. I think it's been good. And I really love what you're saying too about these daily practices about trying ensure your own longevity and taking care of yourself so that you can do the things that you wanna do. Whatever your dream is, maybe it's to learn to salsa dance. Maybe it is to climb a mountain, or maybe it is to just start walking around the neighborhood. But if you put these daily practices in motion you're much more able to chase those dreams. Like, lifting weights or eating well, and all of those little things that we try to do.
Emily: I agree. And I have to say my husband's been such an inspiration to me because he does this on a regular basis. He is one of the most dedicated people that I know, to just take such good care of himself. And he's very mindful and I know it's a daily practice for him day and night. He’s a very strong athlete and he is 50 and he just goes for it and been great for my kids to see. It's pretty awesome.
Christine: So tell us what your biggest challenge with learning to surf has been?
Emily: Probably the mental chatter actually, the self-doubt. Like, oh, I don't know if I can do this. And, I'm intimidated. That kind of talk. So I think that's probably one of the biggest things for me to overcome. And I would say, I’m afraid, what are you afraid of? I think that has been part of like my morning routine. I'll do some meditation and I'll just say to myself, all right, you can. There's nothing to be afraid of and why are you afraid? Let's get to the bottom of it. And there's a lot of exploring in that area that also transfers out to parenting and just life in general. So it's really brought a lot of awareness to me. But I guess that's been one of my biggest challenges with surfing. It's the mental doubt and self-talk that might not be as supportive to myself and I wouldn't say the things sometimes I say to myself, to my friends. I'd be like, you can do it. You've got this! And I'm like, okay. Say that to yourself, we all know this, but…
Christine: And any kookie moment that you can remember?
Emily: Probably when I've been surfing, sometimes I think even today I did it, I caught the wave and I went to go stand up and my hand completely slipped and I slammed my face on the board. I was like, oh my God, that was so stupid. I'm really embarrassed. I just did that. I mean, it was like there was oil on my board. And then I kind of fell off and I was like, a washing machine.
Christine: Well, my kookiest moment as a beginning podcaster was recording this entire interview with you, but not recording. This is our second time. Kooky moments happen in all aspects of life. What is your personal goal with surfing or where do you imagine yourself maybe five or 10 years from?
Emily: Still surfing. Hopefully with my boys, I think they're at least maybe one of them, will get into surfing. I don't know if they both will, but, right now they're into boogie boarding and I'd love to be able to surf with them and just keep going out. And staying strong, staying healthy, staying fit, and surfing with you
Christine: Yes, I know!
Emily: That would be the best thing. I would love that.
Christine: I know. I hope I'm in your future too.
Emily: That's my dream. That's my goal. And I intend for it to happen.
Christine: Oh, I appreciate you so much surf pal!
Emily: Thank you. Thank you. I appreciate you too, surf pal, and I love that you coined us surf pals.
Christine: Thank you so much, Emily.
Emily: Oh, well thank you Christine. It's been super fun. Thank you.
